Short Walk Off A Long Pier

Not Now, But Soon...

2008-09-25T23:40:00.003-04:00

I don't even think anyone besides me comes here anymore...which is fine. I'm back in Philly, New York not far behind me. I'm still not sure if it was worth it, almost two years of struggle, trying times, loss of self, loss of my best friend...but I'll take it as a learning lesson, as to whom I don't want to be, or where I want to be.

I can't look back. I can't dwell. I can't.

So, since I've become so less than eloquent over the years. I let songwriters speak for me. So below, a fave, Imogen Heap...with a song, surprisingly from the Heroes soundtrack, "Not Now, But Soon."

NOT NOW, BUT SOON

Not now, but soon,
The most beautiful light
Will wake us to pillow fighting excitement

Not now, but soon,
Bright into
Every corner,
Satellites maneuver in beams of change,

Standing by the best days of our lives,
Magnificent, the best days of our lives,
Big bang boom, the best days of our lives
They're coming right up
If we can just get through this one.

Who said it was over?
It's as good as it gets
Well we've got a few tricks up our sleeves yet

If we swallow "it's all over" and open wide on these make-to-believe
Sullen, chewed up, sodden soliloquies,
Oh, we're sweet nothings anymore

Terrifying best, days of our lives
We're hanging on the best days of our lives
No two ways about it, best days of our lives
They're coming right up, if we can just get through this one.

I'll hang on grab onto your feet
Someone else holds tied to my shoelaces
When their trouser leg tears, runs and stops at the seam to keep us
dangled together
Until help finds us here

Best days of our lives
Better be the best days of our lives
Bring on the best days of our lives
Coming right up, woah
Coming right up
If we can just get through this one.

If I can just get through this time, I know it'll be okay...god, it's hard though, especially when I was hardly brave enough to tell the bulk of my friends I was leaving NYC. Then again, most of the time I spent in New York, especially towards the end, was in the absence of said friends.

Life is too busy, people have their own things...their own lives, and sometimes, we forget that. I know I did at times...it's just a relief to be done with that now. I'm home, looking for a job, but with family, and I won't be forgotten. Blood doesn't forget. And frankly, I need to not be forgotten. Got a little hairy in NYC towards the end. I felt like I was disappearing, and I kind of wanted to.

Divine from that what you will. I'm making a full recovery now.

Re: Stacks

2008-08-08T00:39:00.002-04:00

Got nothing else right now to say...still mulling, still gestating...still finding my way, but rewatched the season finale of House tonight..and wow, powerful:

Re: STACKs by Bon Hiver

This my excavation and today is kumran

Everything that happens is from now on

This is pouring rain

This is paralyzed

I keep throwing it down two-hundred at a time

It's hard to find it when you knew it

When your money's gone

And you're drunk as hell

On your back with your racks as the stacks as your load

In the back and the racks and the stacks are your load

In the back with your racks and you're un-stacking your load

I've twisting to the sun I needed to replace

The fountain in the front yard is rusted out

All my love was down

In a frozen ground

There's a black crow sitting across from me; his wiry legs are crossed

And he's dangling my keys he even fakes a toss

Whatever could it be

That has brought me to this loss?

On your back with your racks as the stacks as your load

In the back and the racks and the stacks of your load

In the back with your racks and you're un-stacking your load

This is not the sound of a new man or crispy realization

It's the sound of the unlocking and the lift away

Your love will be

Safe with me

So...long time, no long pier, eh?

2008-02-27T21:37:00.002-05:00

Hello Again.

So thanks to the inspiration of a new friend and temp in the trenches (thanks, Alexis!), I decided that it was time to kick start this enterprise again, and I say enterprise, mainly, because I'm going to see Patrick Stewart at BAM on Saturday for Macbeth! (Don't worry, the bad puns never stop)

And thank you to Nate and Jenny for making that happen. It's been a time since I last posted in October. Many things have happened, and many things have not. I think I thought moving to NYC would somehow kill my inertia. It hasn't. I am one for comfort, and I get comfortable very easily where I am. Though I must say, my previous job did move me to take drastic measures for change.

For those who did not know, recruiting is essentially a sales position in the division of Human Resources, at least at my last employer's business ("The Place That Shall Not Be Named or Spoken Of...EVER!" -- except when my former co-workers and I bitch over a pitcher of margaritas)

I was taken rather aback by that and on Christmas Day (or as I like to recall, "Independence Day"), I could not take the misery of that grindfest anymore. I left a VM (I know, tacky) for my pseudo-non-manager manager, and gave my notice.

So since then, I had spent at least three weeks completely freaking out and unemployed, but in the third week of January, I found at least a temporary place to call home...and work. Budget Travel.

Sorry, folks, that's all I'm going to write for now...Project Runway is calling.

More interesting posts, w/ humor and the like, and the interesting goings on (I am going on a date on Friday) to follow.

How can this be...adolescence again?

2007-10-07T21:33:00.000-04:00

I don't know what's going on. I have a stupid teenage-ish crush on a boy, I'm depressed about friends leaving, a feeling I haven't had since I was in high school. I cry without wanting to or without reason at different times. I'm homesick. I feel so out of place. I'm 30...and this is bullshit.

I don't know. I just don't. It hurts and it's scary, and I may be running away soon.

Please just tell me...

2007-09-28T23:45:00.000-04:00

Who else is in a state of may be, might be...could be...moving from NYC...I'll take it like a man...I promise. I'd just like to know before it happens...or maybe happens....whatever...I'm overreacting a little I know, but I'm starting to feel like I'm in some bad horror movie where instead of people being dispatched, they're being reassigned to new lives...elsewhere.

Crap, and realized tonight that the growth and maturity it took to get me back to NYC is the same that's taking these people to their new awesome opportunities. I can't even begrudge...and those who know me, know that the begrudgement part is one of my faves.

OK, venting over. Love you guys, and you all should know who you are (or might be).

No words...

2007-09-23T23:59:00.000-04:00

I'm sad now, and I can't find the words. He's gone.

A Good Start...

2007-03-28T23:43:00.000-04:00

So I bought the new cd by Maria Taylor (formerly of Azure Ray) last night, and I have kind of been taken by the first song on the album. It's called "Good Start" and I don't know...it just speaks to me a bit, where I am now and all that.

By the by, I could not be happier, I spent last night drinking with Leah in a garden setting on the LES and had insanely good brick oven pizza with Ann, Pete & Dave tonight. Two red letter days. And only two days 'til the weekend, during which I am determined to brunch like it's my job:

A Good Start

You're one with the burden of intuition
You're one with the freedom of a blank stare
You're one with the best friend you lost you wish was still there

You're one with the dust on that old piano
You're one with the strings on your new guitar
You're one with the wind through the open window, you are

It was a faint line
That brought you here
And a pulse that kept you in time
It was the comfort of a tradition
But the fear that you were not that kind

And it's a shame now, baby, you can't see yourself in everything you're running from
And it's the same world, honey, that has brought you down
As the one that's gonna pick you up, and pick you up

You're one with the echoes of conversation
You're one with the strangers you overheard
You're one with the lesson that was the best one you learned

It was a faint line that brought you here and a pulse that kept you in time
It was the comfort of a tradition but the fear that you were not that kind
But you are

And it's a shame now, baby, you can't see yourself in everything you're running from
And it's the same world, honey, that has brought you down
As the one that's gonna pick you up, and pick you up

It was a long dark sleepy morning walk, you fell down face to the ground
It was a good start, it was a good start
It was a long dark sleepy morning walk, you fell down face to the ground
It was a good start, it was a good start

And it's a shame now, baby, you can't see yourself in everything you're running from
And it's the same world, honey, that has brought you down as the one that's gonna pick you up
And it's a shame now, baby, you can't separate yourself from where you stood
And it's the same world, honey, made you feel so bad as the one that made you feel so good, feel so good.

You can find this song online for free download...if you seek it out, I think you'll like it.

New Year, New City, New Job...Newness

2007-01-01T01:34:00.000-05:00

So it's about six days or so until I make the move to New York. I think I've finally wrapped my small mind around it, accepted it, and am finally excited about it.

I'm your traditional Catholic guilt, can't let myself enjoy something because obviously enjoyment would equal sin kind of guy. But now I'm so happy, I can't stop smiling. That isn't to say that I'm happy to be leaving my friends/co-workers in Philly, and certainly not my family. My niece is barely six months old, I fear she won't remember me or care to once I come back.

I'm almost 30. I've been talking about moving back to NYC since I graduated college in '99. So that's about 8 years of crap flowing from my mouth without me backing it up. In the past three months or so, I've actually proven that my word means something, and now I'm going to be living back in a town I love, with the friends I love.

So yes, I'm excited. I'm conflicted, but excited. I'm sad to not be living in the city that my mother and sister and niece and nephew and brother-in-law and cousins and aunts live in. But I get to live 2 blocks from my best friend and two amazingly great friends with two amazingly nice girls and a totally cute dog. I have little to complain about.

Talk to me in two months and I will tell you everything that I think will be true now is true. I'm just scared, and exhilirated and nervous, but excited, and just curious how everything will shake out.

But this will be good, if for nothing else, than to prove that I'm stronger than I give myself credit for, and that also, my friends are even more amazing that I thought.

So this is very good. Just skittish. Starting a new job is hard, in a new city, harder still, in an office with many fabulously dressed gay men that embody "urban chic" -- hardest of all.

Damned if I won't make it work though. YAY NEW YORK!

Welcome to the NYC, Bitch!

2006-12-03T23:00:00.000-05:00

So I really can't even describe what this weekend was like in New York. I had a job interview at HX (that's Homo Xtra for those not in the know) and was offered a job pretty much on the spot. The next day, I was lucky enough to go check out the apartment available with Kevin's friend (and hopefully my new friend) Becki and was pretty much given the green light on that as well.

I know I had been scared, and not that I'm not still a little scared, but damnnnnnnnnnnnnn. It feels good to one realize that I am employable, and two realize that people like me enough to let me move into their place.

And to see Ann, Pete, Dave, Leah, Kara, Jeff, Breton, Rich, Erin, Kevin, Joe, Allison and her beau, Michael and see a bunch of my friends, and to now know that come January, this isn't a dream, this isn't me blowing smoke anymore...I'm making this happen, and I'm going to be back with my friends.

Kind of awesome. I have to say. Seriously.

Fun bits from the weekend:

1) The uppance of come will be had!!!!!
2) (wearing an ascot and in the best stop drop and roll impersonation): I ain't afraid of no ghosts!
3) Ann has balls... Pete is convinced of that.
4) Syracuse and its people...all made of salt.
5) If you send a hamburger back for not being rare enough, you're only asking for trouble. Pete, love that tapeworm, as you're now eating for two. :)
6) DUMBO is a breeding ground for breeders.
7) Dolaks and assorted friends will either try to kill you or at least talk about it, when a super-duper awesome apartment is involved.
8) Pete, Pete, Pete, Pete, Pete...you're being glib!
9) Kara's ring...super pretty.
10) Nintendo Wii is the shiznit.
11) I love my friends (new and old).
12) I can frickin' do this, and living in NYC again is going to be so insanely wonderful that I want to pinch myself.
13) I secretly hope that Becki wants the studio apt, so that I can afford to go outside and do things, but still live in the super duper cute house. But if not, I'll just ask friends to come over, hang out, bring alcohol and pay for everything!! hehe
14) Sudoku doesn't improve your brain, it makes it hurt.
15) Target is hard to get to if Pete's driving.
16) I am so incredible happy and overwhelmed right now...it's kind of hard to put into words what emotions go through me at any given point.
17) I am going to miss Philly (my family, my friends, the city itself), but I know that if I were to let more time pass, I'd only regret it and resent myself for doing so.
18) DTPOOP!!!!!!!!!

OK, night folks....

FEAR

2006-11-15T23:17:00.000-05:00

So yeah, this isn't about that movie to the left of this text. It's not about Marky Mark, I'm sorry, Mark Wahlberg and his unhealthy obsession with "Nicole 4 Eva" -- yeah, I've watched the movie a few times.

It's about the fact that I have given myself 8 weeks 'til January 19th to get the heck out of Dodge (aka Philly). I need a job and I need an apt and I'll be damned if I won't be out of here by then.

Seven years I've yammered on about how I was coming back to NYC and how I've missed my friends (neither was untrue, but I'm a little slow on the moving forward bit, so yeah, it's taken a while).

Totally freaking out here though. I've sent out about 20 resumes and cover letters in little over a week and a half or so. No answers yet (I know, follow-up calls--so important). I'm just pretty much crapping my pants in fear that I'm not going to be able to come through in the time I've allotted myself.

Which is crap, I know. I'm smart, I'm educated, I've got experience--I can be hired.

Still scared as anything, and just appreciate that various friends and family have taken time from their lives to try and help me (be it circulating resumes, looking at apt listings or talking me down from freaking myself out too much).

So love you all, see and live in the same city as you soon.

I have two last things to say (and Ann & Dave, you'll know what I'm referencing: MEOW!!! Keep it Real!!!).

Adrienne Shelly

2006-11-07T08:51:00.000-05:00

I have to say that I'm relieved to hear that it doesn't seem Adrienne Shelly killed herself, but it's as great a tragedy to know that some punk construction worker killed her instead. May she rest in peace.

Construction worker charged in actress' death
10:10 p.m. EST, November 6, 2006
NEW YORK (AP) -- A construction worker was arrested and charged with murder in the death of an actress who was found hanging from a shower rod in the bathroom of her apartment.

Police charged Diego Pillco with second-degree murder in the slaying of Adrienne Shelly, Detective Kevin Czartoryski said.

Pillco, 19, was picked up early Monday and was questioned for several hours until "he made statements," said Czartoryski, who would not say what the statements were.
Pillco, of Brooklyn, was expected to be arraigned on the second-degree murder charge in Manhattan, Czartoryski said. There was no home telephone listing for Pillco.

Shelly, who appeared in the movie "Factotum" last year, and was best known for starring in Hal Hartley's independent films, "Trust" and "The Unbelievable Truth," was renovating the inside of the Greenwich Village apartment she used as her residence and office. Pillco, one of the workers, was one of the last people seen going into her apartment, police said.

Shelly, whose birth name was Adrienne Levine, was found Wednesday at about 6 p.m. hanging from a shower rod over the bathtub in her apartment. Police were hesitant to label the case a suicide, observing that no note was found and sneaker prints that did not match Shelly's shoes were recovered from the bathtub.

A spokeswoman for the medical examiner's office, Ellen Borakove, said late Monday that her agency had not determined the cause of Shelly's death, whether by strangulation or other means, or whether it was a homicide.

Shelly, who was born in Queens and grew up on suburban Long Island, was raising a 3-year-old daughter, Sophie, with her husband, Andy Ostroy.

Shelly, 40, was best known for her roles in the Hal Hartley films "The Unbelievable Truth," in which she played Audry Hugo in 1989, and "Trust," in which she starred as Maria Coughlin in 1990. She also appeared as Jerry in "Factotum" with Matt Dillon.

She worked steadily during her career in film, theater and television but later turned to writing and directing, making her directorial debut with "Sudden Manhattan" in 1996. She recently wrote and directed the film "Waitress," starring Keri Russell and Nathan Fillion.

Copyright 2006 The Associated Press. All rights reserved.This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

How Do I Love Yoo...Let me count the ways.

2006-10-31T23:19:00.000-05:00

So to the left you see me and my best friend EVER, Ann Yoo.

All I will say is that I love that beautiful woman in the picture so much.

On my right hand in the picture, you can see a ring. She gave it to me two weeks or so after meeting one another, in the back room of the Tinker. To me, it is a wedding ring of sorts. I can't be that straight man she might need - I can't be her forever hubby - but I can be a man that loves her forever. And I am that man.

She's my love, my heart, my best friend. And when the man that is right for her comes along, I'll gladly step aside. 'Til then, I'll be her gay bff and her sidekick.

What's the point of this blog? Well, it's to say, I LOVE ANN YOO. I just wanted to take the time out to let her know she's aces in my book; that's right, I said, ACES!!!! And I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who feels that way. Who's with me people? Share the YOO love.

NEW TAKE OUT---Make Mine Korean!!!!!!

2006-10-11T12:14:00.000-04:00

So, I dedicate this post to my sweetie & best friend, Ann Yoo! Ann had taken me to the Kum Gang San (I think that's how it's spelled, but I'm a cracker, so excuse the incorrect spelling if it's not) right before I left NYC yet again. And after lying to me for 7 years about how she was going to take me, I experienced what can only be an eye opening (har har) experience.

The food was insane. My eyes, nose and mouth watered simultaneously, and I couldn't get enough kimchi. Was in a word...DELISH!

So, as many Korean-Philadelphians chose to follow their dry cleaner calling instead of cooking, I came back to Philly with very little options to satiate my growing jonesing for the Korean. That is, until Giwa opened up a couple of blocks from my work.

Well as I type, I'm scarfing down Bulgogi, Rice & Kimchi, and I think I may actually stop at Giwa on the way home to get some more kimchi. It's soooooo good, and incredibly small. And I want more.....KOREAN KIMCHI!!!

But damn, had to write about how good the food is (and affordable for at least 2 or 3 times a month, maybe four) and thank Ann again for showing me that Thai food ain't got nothing on Korean.

Yum.

re: Sleater-Kinney Concert approaches...and so does, Andy Dick?

2006-07-26T12:52:00.000-04:00

So I'm heading to the Sleater-Kinney concert next Monday, 7/31, with two cool kids from NYC, the soon at the altar pair of Nate & Jenny, and I'm totally psyched to be able to go see a great show with two people I adore...but I do have one thing that gives me pause.

And that one thing is...Andy Dick. Now, Andy Dick is not his real name, but the nickname I assigned to my ex when we stopped talking a few months back. I figure the name serves a two-fold purpose, giving people who haven't (and have) met him an idea of who he looks like and allowing him anonymity just in case I trash his (pseudo) name.

Which I don't intend to do, but back to the (Andy) Dick. He positively adores Sleater-Kinney and could not contain his overjoyed nature when he heard The Woods for the first time. He proceeded to foist a burned copy of the CD onto me, and finally after his urging, I did listen to the CD and thought it was definitely an amazing album.

Well, my issue is that we haven't talked or seen each other (except for the occasional glimpse of him skulking down the street) for months and as Sleater-Kinney is breaking up, I know he'll be at the show. And probably with his latest boyfriend, Cippolini. Again, not his real name.

So (and I know it's not a matter of 'if') when I see him, what should I do? I avoid eye contact, keep a berth of 3 feet between he and I at all times and vomit on him should he speak to me?

Just curious what your opinion is. He kind of hurt my feelings right before we stopped speaking, so it's not as though I hate him, but let's just say he's a...Andy Dick!

Ah, screw it, if I see him, I'll give him a "Fuck Off" look and go abouts having fun with Nate & Jenny at a cool show. Issue resolved.

Anorexic Finally Takes A Bite of Something...Her Boyfriend

2006-07-11T13:15:00.000-04:00

Ok, I know, maybe I shouldn't find this funny, but dammit, I do. The chick in the article is an anorexic mess, but that didn't stop her from taking a bite out of her boyfriend.

`Real World' Cast Member Arrested for Assault
CROMWELL, Conn. (AP), July 11, 2006 - A cast member on MTV's "The Real World" was arraigned on a misdemeanor assault charge after police said she bit her boyfriend during a domestic dispute.
Paula Ann Meronek, 25, allegedly bit her boyfriend several times when he refused to let her into their home early Sunday morning, police said.
"I think it was an argument that led to one thing then another," said Cromwell Police Chief Anthony Salvatore. "He attempted to keep her from the house. It got physical and we were contacted."
Meronek, who was arraigned Monday, was charged with third-degree assault, which carries a potential penalty of a year in prison. She is due back in court Aug. 11. No lawyer was listed in court documents.
Her boyfriend, John Alyward, was charged with disorderly conduct. The arrest was first reported by The Middletown Press.
"The Real World," now in its 17th season, puts seven strangers together in an exotic locale - this time in a Key West, Fla., beach house.
A call to the show's producer was not immediately returned.
(Copyright 2006 by The Associated Press. All Rights Reserved.)

The Things You Learn (The Ann & Leah Remix)

2006-05-24T23:20:00.000-04:00

So, a long while ago, I had a gaggle of friends come down to Philly, and I learned a few things about 'em, but two other dear friends blessed me with their presence this past weekend, and I couldn't do the event justice without a David Letterman-style Top 10 list. so here goes:

TOP 10 REASONS PHILLY'S JUST BETTER...WITH MY GIRRRRLLLLS ANN & LEAH:

1) Left or Right? ALWAYS Right!
2) If Leah starts all innocent-like with the question, "Can you name a few cities in Texas?" Don't answer.
3) "He had a nice body, I mean, he was tight. No, not like that."
4) House of Wax: This truly is a horror movie. It's been over an hour and Paris still isn't dead.
5) Ann & Leah & I in TLA Video looking for something to drag home to watch after a night of drinking. We stopped on the aforementioned House of Wax but needless to say, Ann and Leah, too, tried to get me to buy porn. Nice try, kids.
6) Duck tour? What Duck Tour? (Yeah, Leah, you forgot about that one!)
7) Not one friend of mine actually can stand my music (Ann and my co-worker Regina bonded over the "dying cats-ish-ness" of my musical choices).
8) The Olive Garden really does serve unlimited breadsticks and salad.
9) Ann's mom is imminently huggable.
10) If you eat anything deep fried, it doesn't count--if you're out of state.
11) A corn kernel is totally Spanish Fly
12) A movie named Troll 2 isn't about trolls, but goblins...DERR!

ok, that's all's I gots for now. more than 10, i know, but it's my prerogative. ladies, any additions?

i have one, but this is just a general warning. NO ONE GET A FAUX HAWK!!!!! i saw an ex walking down the street today, and you've never seen a more ridiculous fashion statement. though, it might have been his face that gave me pregnant pause.

later, gators. :)

The Things You Learn...

2006-02-22T23:44:00.000-05:00

So, this past weekend, being a tour guide for Philly, I learned many things, among them:

1) Don't tickle Pete. He won't like it...no, like not just not like but severely hate being tickled...and he will bruise you...SEVERELY!

2) Dave is a man whose hunger cannot be contained fully. If he starts to grumble, grab anything edible and feed him.

3) Test Icicles is almost exactly the same as testicles, but only one of the two has just broken up.

4) Trivial Pursuit DVD cannot be played to its full completion if you've been smoking any tobacco of strange derivation.

5) Hot, Steamy, Sweaty...all of these are valid adjectives for go-go boys/strippers/what have you...sticky is NOT! god no. please, don't ever use that term again ever.

6) "Philly doesn't suck." Thanks, Jenny. :)

7) Cheesesteaks will cure any hangover.

8) An almost 3 year old can speak gibberish in the same tone and cadence if he thinks he's found his audience.

9) 15 year old virtuoso drummers can pass for 21 years old in bars, if their mother, a pimp daddy grandpa and some random gay guy keep insisting it's so.

10) what?!?!

only came up with 10 for now, but there were about 10 million others...wait, one more thing:

Did you know? The names of the Hardy Boy brothers that no one spoke of EVER were Buffy & Hildegarde? True story.

Come for the Cheesesteaks...Stay for the Crack

2006-02-17T14:19:00.000-05:00

So, this weekend I will be playing the role of Julie, The Activities Director, on The Love Boat, when Pete, Dave, Jenny & Nate make the long trek down from NYC to good ol' Philadelphia, aka The City of Brotherly Love (and no pete & dave, it's not like your sort of brotherly love).

And I must give them kudos for rushing down here so quickly, considering I've only been living here for almost 7 years now since graduating Fordham and abandoning the safe bosom of NYC.

But the important thing is that I'm not bitter. Anyways, I'm super excited to show them around town, plus we're going to be taking in a little live theatre courtesy of the Flashpoint Theatre Co.

So I'm sure there'll be some debauchery, and perhaps even some harassment of my dear friends by homeless people and/or just the friendly denizens of this fine city. And I know one thing for sure, they are going to go nuts over my homemade sauce and homemade pasta which I spent over two hours cranking out the other night. That, my friends, is what I like to call dedication. Dedication to giving my friends a good time, and a good meal.

And a shout out to my darling, Ann, and her emotionally stunted sidekick, Leah, who will be making the trek down here at the end of March. You will be missed this time around, but take a look at this picture to see what will be in store for that trip.

Final Destination 3...

2006-02-10T10:48:00.000-05:00

So as some of you may know, I have a penchant for horror movies, whether they be brilliantly crafted or totally pieces of crap (Leah/Ann, perhaps you can vouch for this with your Killer Instincts). On Wednesday night, I got to see a movie that falls somewhere between the two...perhaps closer to the latter, but it was beyond enjoyable in a can't catch your breath, they're killing people really crazily sort of way. The movie of which I speak - Final Destination 3.

Now some of you may be saying to yourself, "Ryan, you monger of horror movie cheese, you lover of all things awful and bad...tell me you're not going to praise that recycled piece of celluloid feces." Well, folks, I am going to praise the movie.

Compared in tone to the first and second movies, I'd say it's closer to Final Destination 2, which is actually a good thing. While the first doesn't hold up as a gratifying thrill ride upon repeat viewings, the second film really was a shining example of what a horror movie should be (if it can't be a classic, that is) - a no holds barred, breathtaking display of inventive grue and crazy deaths.

So if you're not sure that you would like this film, let's give you a skeleton outline of what to expect. Character development? No, derr. Crazy ass rollercoaster crash with bodies flying everywhere that includes people stuck upside down in a loop while holding on for dear life to their harnesses? Yep. Tanning beds that kill? Uh-huh. Things that will make you reconsider visiting a fast food drive thru, gym, home improvement store (Homo Depot? Hell to the no!), fireworks display, or even the New York Subway. That's right, my Gotham friends...you're not safe in the subway.

Anyways, I really enjoyed the film. Smirk if you will. Question my taste if you must. But damn if I wasn't really entertained for a little over 90 minutes. And by the way, that goth-y looking girl above...one of the most horrific/surprising deaths I've seen in a long, long time.

And yes, Ann, I'm going to make you watch this when it comes out on DVD, so be prepared.

for ann...

2006-01-30T16:14:00.000-05:00

i know you're working your little pootie off. so here's something i thought might bring a little smile to your face....or might just bring a little hunger to your tummy. MMM, korean barbecue = tasty doggie.

SADONNA...

2006-01-27T10:40:00.000-05:00

...i found this picture...and all i have to say is...yowza! time has not been kind to the Material Mom.

re: bear in the straight world...

2006-01-25T14:10:00.000-05:00

so last night i was talking with my best gal pal, Ann, and we were talking about who of the two of us was fatter.

Ann insisted even though she's shorter that she's fatter than I am, and I said, "hell to the no!"

I told her that while she thinks that she may be more zaftig, I believed that I was, especially since I am not judged by straight people, but by my gay brethren & sistren (it's a word...because I say so!). In the gay world, you have essentially two options of groups to join if you don't want to be invisible: Anorexic Twink or Chelsea Boy...(Wait there is a third!!!!)...or Chubby Bear.

Ann insisted she was "a Bear in the straight world." Which gave me pause...could there be such a thing? or was Ann just trying to trump my insistence that I was the fatter of she and I? I think it's the latter, because frankly, Ann doesn't like to lose...EVER!

so what do you think....which one of us looks more the bear?

You're either in....or you're out...but there will never be too much TOOTIE!!!!

2006-01-24T16:20:00.000-05:00

So....last week on Project Runway, the designers had a special assignment to design a skating outfit for that (troll, troll, troll) Olympic Competitor, Sasha Cohen. It was definitely something different for the designers, and it led to one of my favorite Project Runway quotes ever (besides all the mean stuff that people said about Wendy Pepper in Season 1).

Anne Slowey, one of the judges and Editor in Chief of Toe Pick Monthly, describes massively tall and massively untalented Emmett's design as "vulgar," and that it spotlights "too much tootie."

So I ask you...is there really such a thing as too much Tootie?

Well, after much prodding....

2006-01-24T15:50:00.000-05:00

....here i am on blogspot. You have Ann Yoo to thank for that...and you and you and you. Well, let's hope this is better than my former livejournal. ;)